It took me days, weeks and even months to figure out if I wanted to write a post about regarding this situation. As a blogger I think there is a fine line between sharing TOO much information with your readers, to really wanting to connect with your readers and have them continue to follow, understand, respect and moreover-get to you the person behind the words on the computer screen. This is me. You take it or leave it. I want to keep my readers in the loop especially when it comes to my competition prep. I know I would throw up one picture, some would see a scar and the questions would start coming in (that scar was not there last year) Besides that, I think it is important to share this story because I do not want to let one single event define who I am and where I will go. It happened, It was awful but its in the past.
I chose to not 'ignore it' but I also chose not to speak openly about it at the time. It was my life, I was dealing with some serious health issues and I didn't need anymore questions, attention (both positive and negative) or worry warts.
It is now 5 months past and I am just starting to accept what happened to me. After I was out of the hospital I even ignored it. I wanted to pretend like it never happened. I would get bills and letters in the mail from the hospital and my doctors and just throw them aside. My mom and dad would see them and wonder why I hadn't responded to something. I figured if I threw the mail aside everything would go away and I wouldn't have to 'follow up' Sadly, this is not how life works. It happened and I had to deal with it and GROW from it.
Back in Early March I began getting severe abdominal pains one day. I mean SEVERE. Not 'time of the month' cramps or "I drank to much water and ran" cramps, but I am talking I couldn't walk up stairs or walk up straight without having to bend over because it hurt so bad. I figured it would go away so I just tried to go on with my day. It didn't. I went home that night and had my dad take me to the ER because it was just getting worse. I sat there and waited for hours and finally got called in. I was told to drink this 'pina colada' tasting fluid (hardly) over the course of 2 hours. What the solution did was basically light up my colon so that when I went in for a cat scan they could see any abnormalities. I did the drink, did the cat scan and what they reported was that I was constipated. "Ok" I said to myself. Great, so I was sent home on a regimen of stool softeners, BRAT diet etc. Nothing crazy, but it would take a few days to feel 100%
Days went by on this regimen that I was following and I was actually feeling worse. It got to the point where it was painful to walk (even bent over) I went to the hospital for the initial assessment on a Wednesday and by that Sunday I KNEW something was not right. I knew my body and tried to ignore it (as we all do) but I just couldn't do that any longer. Something was wrong. I went back to the hospital on Sunday and got taken in right away. They did some tests and within about 15 minutes I had a surgeon above my hospital bed telling me I needed to have emergency surgery NOW.
"A very serious condition where an untreated ulcer can burn through the wall of the stomach (or other areas of the gastrointestinal tract allowing digestive juices and food to leech into the abdominal cavity. Treatment generally requires immediate surgery. A diagnosis is made by taking an erect abdominal/chest Xray (seeking air under the diaphragm). This is in fact one of the very few occasions in modern times where surgery is undertaken to treat an ulcer. Many of the perforated ulcers have been attributed to the bacterium H-Pylori"
Basically, when I went to the hospital they took an xray and cat scan of my colon, and the perforation happens up by the chest and abdominal cavity so they didn't 'catch' it then. They took more in depth xrays when I went back and saw what had happened right away. Simply put, I had an ulcer, it burst through the walls of my intestine and free air was floating around my abdomen. Painful, awful and scary. Tears immediately started uncontrollably going down my face.
Hours later, I woke up from my surgery. Lying with IV's in my arm, bandages on my stomach, groggy, crying and still wondering 'what brought me to this place' Why was I lying on a hospital bed at 26 years old, in great health. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I eat well. What is going on?! After a few days of having my family and nurses assist me in the simplest tasks such as walking, getting up from my bed to the bathroom, eating, laughing...I began to really think about ME. I started thinking about my past and what it is that could have brought me to this place. During recovery, while in the hospital, I was encouraged to take daily walks around my floor. The floor in totality would take any seemingly healthy person about 2 minutes to walk around it once. It took me about 20 minutes, and was using my IV for balance the whole way. I would peek inside each room and see all sorts of people in for different reasons. It made me realize that what happened to me could happen to anyone. Anyone at anytime can experience a scare that shakes up their entire life. It made me appreciate my health and immediately forced me to become so in-tune with my body-even more than I was prior.
I should mention that now, I am 100% HEALTHY. I do not have a lingering ulcer in my body. This is not the type of thing where I can get stressed and 'my ulcer will come back' It was removed out of my body and this situation can NEVER happen again. I followed up (and still am) following up with a GI Doctor, my surgeon and my primary care physician. I am in 100% perfect health and was about 2 months post surgery as well.
I have a history of anxiety. I know this about myself. I can cause myself to stress very easily. When I was in college, I dealt with anxiety attacks and getting more in tune with my body. You could say there was a time in my life that I would always be on edge. The littlest events or things could trigger my responses and it took me a while to figure out the perfect way for ME to deal with stress. Anxiety aside, I will say that any diet changes or excessive exercise is stress to the body. Anytime you are restricting yourself with food, overdoing it with workouts, you are creating an unhealthy environment in your body.
At the time that this happened to me, I was dabbling with the Paleo diet. Now, I know that there are hundreds and thousands of people on the Paleo diet and by all means I think if they like it, works for them--that's so great and I am so thrilled that they have found a way of eating that works for them. I went from a well rounded, healthy diet of beautiful fruits, veggies, grains, dairy, healthy fats, meat, fish-you name it to extreme strict Paleo. I was following the Paleo diet about 10 days prior to my surgery. I am not saying AT ALL that this caused me be in the hospital, however, I do think that I was putting my body under extreme stress by restricting foods that otherwise always sat fine with me. I am not intolerant to gluten, I do well with carbs, I eat grains, I love dairy and my body in no way had to cut these foods out. I CHOSE to cut these foods out for no reason other than because I was curious. I also have a somewhat acidic environment in my body which is more prone to ulcers. I have always had history of acid reflux and was taking some meds for it several months before the surgery. The combination of my 'acidic enviornment', acid reflux, Paleo, (crazy strict diet) was providing my body with a lack of nutrients that it was used to getting for 26 years. It went into shock mode. Yes, I was still exercising throughout this "Paleo experiment" not anything out of the norm. Just my normal workouts. But I do think that a combination of things that put my body over the edge.
So what really caused this? We don't know. They ran every test under the sun for cancerous tumors, bacteria, H-Pylori (which is a bacterial virus that they figured was the root cause) Every single test came back negative. What it comes down to is "sometimes these things happen and we have no explanation" For both my Doctors and my family, this is the most frustrating answer of all. It is much easier to say "A caused B" but in this case, there was no cause and effect.
What I do know is that moment when the Doctor came in to say I was ready to be released home, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief. I couldn't believe I was going to able to be in my own bed, without being woken up 3 times in the middle of the night to take blood. I was going to be able slowly get my life back. It was a scary but thrilling feeling.
What I do know is that moment when the Doctor came in to say I was ready to be released home, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief. I couldn't believe I was going to able to be in my own bed, without being woken up 3 times in the middle of the night to take blood. I was going to be able slowly get my life back. It was a scary but thrilling feeling.
Shortly after I was released home, while I was sitting in my house, not able to do much but walk, not able to eat because I had no appetite, I got thinking about my health. It was when I wrote this post "Improving your health and well-being" which I encourage you all to read. In a nutshell, I talk about how it sometimes takes a striking event or situation to make us realize how precious our bodies are. So many times we can take small things for granted until one day, something stops working or goes wrong. Within a matter of 24 hours, we can completely re-evaluate our health and it can cause us to look at food, health, stress, life and our bodies in a different way.
So here I am, 2 weeks out from my show. I didn't even know if I was going to compete this season because of what happened. I knew that if I chose a show toward the end of the summer, this would give my body the perfect amount of recovery time. I have to say I worked my butt off in the weight room as soon as I got the green light to do so. I experienced some muscular imbalances that I am still working on due to the body position that I was in post surgery. I was basically hunched over because I couldn't fully extend my abdominals. This caused my shoulders and upper back to slouch in a kyphotic nature. I have been working through some corrective exercises and laying off of any overhead or intense shoulder workouts because my rotator cuff is still recovering. Just because I wasn't able to lift crazy heavy in my upper body, that didn't mean that I couldn't hit the heavy weights with my lower body. I am so proud of my lower body and how hard I worked. I am still working on building up the strength I had but I have to say that I am damn close.
What helped even more? I layed OFF of the cardio. Wow what a difference I have seen. This close to show, when most increase their cardio...I have (and was told) to decrease it. 3x a week for 30 minutes. THAT'S IT. I am focusing more on maintaining the muscle I worked hard to get and keeping my diet spot on. Excess cardio will cause overtraining and stress to the adrenal system-simply put. This is something I certainly do not need. Not only this, but cardio is NOT what will change your body. It is the weight training. Keeping it simple and effective. There is no need to get crazy with it. Stick to the basics. Lift Heavy and FEEL each movement.
Raw, unedited picture taken last week (3 weeks out)
This is a comparrison of me in September 2010 (when I first joined Cathy Savage Fitness) and then the 3 week out picture. When I look at this side by side shot, I realized everything that I have been through in the past two years. Ups and downs and now, with a new scar on my body that I have not had to look at for 26 years, I realize that this scar does not define who I am. I define who I am. Never let a situation, event or other person define you. That means you are simply not living your life. Be your own leader. Be unique, embrace your beauty and above all RESPECT YOURSELF AND YOUR BODY
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| Love this!! |
- Exercise: whatever form that makes you happy
- Express yourself: If you are in an argument with someone, express how you feel and do not let it stay bottled up. This will create stress in itself
- Practice relaxation: yoga, meditation, reading, podcasts. Anything that relaxes your body will teach it to create an overall sense of 'calm'
- Be Positive: Smile more and try to look at situations with more of an optimistic view
- Stop Striving for Perfection: Be realistic-you are human! Stop trying to go above and beyond on every little thing in your life. Work at it, do your best and reward yourself.
- SLEEP! Aim for 7-8 hours of quality sleep a night. Get into a routine and stick with it! You will feel refreshed and energized.
- Get Rid of Toxic People: A few years ago I made a pledge to myself to get rid of all negativity in my life. If there is someone who always seems to bring you down, they are not worth having around. You deserve to smile. All of the time.
- Be Happy: Make it a point to smile. Everyday. Appreciate your life and be grateful for all that you have
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